Of worth and fitting in
For those who know me, this will come as absolutely no surprise to you, but I deeply struggle with feeling like I am of worth and with the reality that I simply do not “fit in.” How old am I? These sound like the words of a pre-adolescent. Unfortunately, yes, I am 27 and am still dwelling on myself. I think of Hebrews 5.12 and know that I should be past all this, but yet I am not. (“In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!”)Ah, sigh.
What can lug me out of my selfishness? A ministry I can dive head-first into? (Tegucigalpa, anyone?) Not dwelling on my desire for academia? Focusing on my spouse and thinking of his needs rather than my own? Yes, perhaps these and more, but I think all I really need to do is simply rely on my heavenly Father’s view of me. I need to listen to what He says about me (and speaking of listening, read this amazing bit) and more than that, focus on
Who
He
Is.
Ego ami (sorry, no greek characters)—“I Am.” Just dwelling on those words makes me think of this incredible song with such poignant words...
I AM
by Lori Chaffer
I am more than you think
I am more than you know
I’m as black as the darkest night
And whiter than snow
You’re tipping through wires and words
And spires and tombstones
I have burned with desire
Felt the air become fire
Buried Myself with stones
Given lions my bones
And I love you whether or not you believe Me
I’m as swift as an arrow
But I’m slow when you stray
I’m as calm as the waters
That we walked on that day
And I love whether or not you believe Me
If you ask Me again
My reply still will stand
I am who I am
And I love whether or not you believe Me
all for now @
3:01 PM
0 comment(s):
Post a comment
<< Home